Happiness comes in many shapes and forms – different things make different people happy; what defines it for me personally might mean something totally different to someone else. Happiness is a choice and I choose to be happy.
Circumstances do not define my happiness; instead my soul and mind are the driving forces behind it. Since I became ill, the scale by which I measure it changed, I became much more appreciative as to what is important in my life. My sense of values also shifted, I realized that I was searching for happiness outside my home, while it was inside of me all the time, I was looking in the wrong place.
The first step to experiencing happiness was acceptance, once I learned to accept my situation, I found serenity and peace that I had never felt before. In an almost contradictory way my illness became a blessing for myself and my family. With acceptance came contentment, being content I think was the key that unlocked the door to my joy. Learning how to be appreciative and grateful for the little, simple things in our life that bring us sanctity is priceless. I had to accept my limitations, and seek to find satisfaction within myself and within my home. My home became my new surrounding, and although I spend lots of time alone, I am never lonely.
These days my happiness comes from my family, if they are in good spirits then that is more than enough for me, I experience it vicariously through them. I feel their joy in so many ways, if they are having a good day then that is reflected on my own day. I also find happiness in compassionate gestures; a kind word, or a, an unexpected kiss (wink) ha ha. Happiness is being surrounded by friends and family, it is a visit from one of my sons or daughter in law, even a simple Skype session with them. Happiness is giving back, it is being told I am inspiring, or helping somebody in need. It could come from listening to a good song, or having a good meditation session. Happiness is waking up with no pain and a goodnight’s sleep.
I might miss some activities in my life like walking, talking or even just feeding myself, but that does not define or dictate whether I am happy or not. Many people might think I am suffering, but believe me I am in a very good place. I look around me, count my blessings, and realize I have so much to be grateful for. I am at peace, I am content, I have found my serenity and I am happy.